It is increasingly hard to make new friends, much less ones you consider true. Trust is harder to give. Loyalty more difficult to find. This is even more so the case when you move to a new area. I see this so evidently with my children as we adjust to our new town.
My philosophy is that you should do something you love, something that interests you. Chances are high that you will end up meeting someone doing the same thing, making it easy to have something in common to share.
My daughter loves to read. We cannot go antiquing without coming home with an arm full of books. She would read 100 books a day if people would just let her. Sometimes it is hard to get her out of her room when she is surrounded by a pile of books, but it is hard to meet new people and make new friends trapped inside your own home. Therefore, we try to get both kids outdoors in places they are exposed to other children. This is especially important since they are homeschooled.
The trick is finding something they like to do that is also enjoyable for us adults. Summer makes it a bit easier, as there are plenty of outdoor activities, like the beach and fishing.
The next challenge is for our children to overcome their fears of saying hello and breaking through their newfound shyness. Sometimes they ask another kid to play and get turned down. The rejection is hard to handle, which makes it more challenging for them to keep introducing themselves.
Eventually, we will get them involved in extracurricular activities, such as martial arts. This is something that seems to interest them both, and it is guaranteed exposure to other kids in similar age groups.
In the meantime, one easy way to help break the ice is to do something interesting that draws the attention of those you wish to engage. I have told my children before to start playing with something and evetually others will join in on the fun. Massive sandcastles and giant holes in the sand are sure fire ways to get other kids to join.
Making something seem fascinating will entice others to check out what you are doing. If they continue to find it interesting, they will likely stick around and become a new friend.
This is a bit harder for adults, as the older we get the less we find interesting. Generally, what used to be interesting is now seen as inconvenient and exhausting, especially with kids. However, as our kids get older, the more we have in common with them, which helps motivates us to get out and explore.
We are less likely to meet people we consider true friends, but our kids still have the opportunity to build those lifelong relationships. That is critical in a society that makes strong bonds so rare. We must continue to do our part as parents to ensure our children have a reliable and trustworthy support system after we leave this Earth.
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